So often do i get asked that question which i’m sure many others get asked more than they care for ‘So, when do you plan on settling down?‘. The short answer..? ‘never.’
I’ve always been one to keep my relationship status under wraps, simply to have some privacy – and don’t get me wrong, I plan on keeping it that way! But I also recently became aware that there was a deeper reason I was being so secretive.
I realised I was confused. Confused on whether I was comfortable with my status… from the age of 18-25 I was in a serious relationship, engaged with a mortgage kind of serious. I’m now 28 and I’ve remained single for coming up to three years now. Partially down to self healing & partially due to reasons i’m going to explain…
Don’t get me wrong i’ve dated, some ending uncomfortably with lessons to be learnt, others simply fizzling out due to bad timing or incompatibility… I hold no ill feeling towards either outcome as they’ve helped me to evolve as a person & to understand truly what it is i’m after – and why i choose to remain single.
Most days I find myself completely comfortable with being single, but i’d be lying if i didn’t say there were moments I can be feeling insecure and lonely – i know i’m not alone with this… Growing up the majority of us are subconsciously conditioned to pursue this ‘ideal life’, get good grades, get the good job with the good company and the good perks, get the good partner, have a good marriage & pop out 2.4 children to live that good life. & to be frank, this is relatively obtainable for most people. Theres plenty of the ‘good fish’ out there – men & woman – who will treat you good & be a good companion through life. However, me personally? good will never suffice. Out of respect to not only myself, but the other person involved. Life’s too short for that shit.
I feel fortunate to of had a brief encounter with the extraordinary, leading me down the path of understanding why we should never settle down – only level up. Of course i need to caveat that love comes in MANY forms & individuals each have their own place in our lives, but right now i’m simply talking about that soul mate connection, the life partner vibe – that magical elevating kind. The type that inspires you, motivates you, supports you & betters you. The kind that knows no boundaries and offers itself unconditionally. One that requires no verbal explanation due to its deep, genuine connection. The real deal.
So no, i don’t see myself settling down ever – levelling up? I have faith – when the time and person is right.
So my message here is don’t settle for attraction when the conversations aren’t deep, and don’t get caught out by seduction when there’s no real life connection. (A whole other topic pending…)